


Maybe one day we know

by GalaxyPixel



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, First Words, Fools in Love, Last words, M/M, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Spock is a Good Friend (Star Trek), Star Trek: Into Darkness Spoilers, idiots to lovers, jim and bones dont have smart brains, they need help talking, too long to realise
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-18
Updated: 2020-08-18
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:13:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,779
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25976500
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GalaxyPixel/pseuds/GalaxyPixel
Summary: Jim Kirk and Leonard McCoy both didn't want anything to do with soulmates anymore. They both fell in love, but thought the other deserved to get to know their soulmate. They're both dumb idiots who just need to have a conversation.-----Leonard looked again. His words had changed. This meant his soulmate had died. He should have known his soulmate, they would have said at least the first words to Leonard, which means they spoke.
Relationships: James T. Kirk/Leonard "Bones" McCoy
Comments: 6
Kudos: 70





	Maybe one day we know

**Author's Note:**

> So in this Universe you get born with the first words your soulmate says to you. When they die, those words change into the last words they say to you. (Or when you die their words change).

When Jim was younger he didn’t like his soulmate words. It would mean they were sick when they met, or that the other guy was really scared. Like when you’re on a Ferris Wheel or a rollercoaster and get so scared you throw up. When he got older he learned it could also be that the other person was just drunk.

Because Jim met a lot of drunk people. The first time someone uttered the words to him he was 16, he had snuck into the bar in Riverside and just wanted to get a drink. The person next to him reeked of alcohol, then turned to Jim to say his words. Jim was too stunned that he had heard his words, he didn’t move out of the way. That was a mistake, since the guy really did throw up on him. It wasn’t his soulmate (luckily) because a waitress helped Jim to the back to get him a clean shirt, and told him that the man was always sad this time of year since he lost his soulmate some years ago in a crash. At least they were a couple and knew they were soulmates. Jim would hate to be the guy who didn’t know his soulmate until they died. 

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Leonard found his soulmate! Her name was Jocelyn and she was beautiful. He met her at a high school dance, while he didn’t even want to go there. Apparently her boyfriend made her mad, and she wanted to dance with someone else. Leonard was just standing on the side, not so sure about this dancing part of the school dance. But while Leonard was looking at all the couples and friends dancing around (no, he was not scared) Jocelyn walked up to him and said: ‘I think these things are pretty safe.’ She then pulled him onto the dancefloor to dance. 

All Leonard could say was: ‘I wasn’t scared.’ And Jocelyn smiled even bigger. They danced the entire night, and in the end, Jocelyn left with him, not her boyfriend. They talked about their words, because Jocelyn had said his, but he didn’t know if he had said hers too. He had, so Jocelyn broke up with Clay and they started dating. It was wonderful. 

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jim wished he could change his words. At least have a different pair of words, or cut them off his arm. Which wouldn’t work, the news covered stories about people wanting to get rid of theirs because they didn’t believe in soulmates. But they always got them back. It was just a part of them, forever.

At least his words weren’t a greeting or just his name. Then it would be impossible to find out who his soulmate was. Maybe he just heard his words a lot because he was often in bars. And in bars, people drink. Some people drink too much, so they get drunk. And drunk people vomit. It would help a lot more if he met strangers in the bar, but nobody visits Riverside. Besides some Starfleet personnel and people who are there for the shipyard. But at least half of them are working, and working Starfleet officers don’t get drunk.

So Jim was indifferent to his words. They didn’t stand out, he heard them lots of times (cons of working in a bar) but it also wasn’t something as general as a greeting. That would suck even more. So he didn’t look too much into it when he finally joined Starfleet, and the guy in the seat next to him said: ‘I might throw up on you’.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Leonard didn’t like soulmate words. What is the point in having the first words of someone on your body, if it wouldn’t work out? And you would only know they were your real soulmate after they died. So, now he was here, with a divorce under his belt, and no soulmate. Jocelyn might be his soulmate, but he believed that soulmates would be together forever, and not torn apart by some loneliness and arguments which would end in divorce. 

So, Jocelyn wasn’t his soulmate. And it took way too long to find that out. Others would argue that he found out in time, since he still has a whole life in front of him, and now he can meet the real one, and be together until the end of time! Leonard was not waiting for that. Meet someone who said your words, while you say theirs, and then live together happily ever after? You wouldn’t know for certain until they died. So you could spend your entire life with the wrong person, even if your first words match.

And who says soulmates are romantic? Nobody knows. Leonard was just done with it and was never going to look for his soulmate. Why he was here on a shuttle, going to fly to his death, he didn’t know either. But at least he would be far away from Jocelyn.

The woman from the shuttle put him harshly in his seat, next to another man who didn’t wear cadet reds. At least he wasn’t the only one who applied at the last possible moment. He realised they were about to take off, which meant that the thing he was sitting in would fly! He looked to the guy next to him, to warn him about his aviophobia. All that came out was: ‘I may throw up on you.’

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jim smiled reassuringly at the man next to him. He didn’t look sick. Probably scared of flying then, that is what he mentioned to the woman who put him into the seat next to him. ‘I think these things are pretty safe,’ he replied. He would not let the guy be scared the entire flight, this was Starfleet, flying is always involved! Telling that the shuttlecraft was safe wasn’t the best idea, since now the guy was going on and on about how they could still die in here. Did he have no chill? You don’t have to share all the ways to die in space with a room full of people wanting to go into space! That is like, rule number one.

In the end, the guy talked so much that they were landing when he was finally done with his rant. At least the guy was distracted the entire ride. And he was kinda nice and interesting. Jim was so going to hack the system to make this guy his roommate at the Academy. I mean, he even shared his booze with Jim! Leonard McCoy also didn’t look up at Jim’s name, which meant he didn’t look at him as the son of George Kirk, the hero from the USS Kelvin. Jim already had a nickname for Leonard. Leonard is an old guy's name, and he isn’t that old yet. He would call him ‘Bones.’ Because apparently he is a doctor. And all he got left were his bones. That’s what he told Jim, so he can’t even blame Jim for coming up with the nickname!

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

‘Ugh Jim, what is this?’ Leonard looked around their shared dorm room and counted at least 5 different alcohol bottles, and a stack of Holo-vids. ‘Well, since this is our last year of the Academy, we should celebrate because after this we only see our crew and lots and lots of aliens, who don’t have soulmates.’

Leonard stared at Jim and decided not to argue with him. He knew Jim didn’t like soulmates that much either, they both had weird sentences and even though Jim might have said his sentence, Jim never said anything about Leonard saying Jim’s words. And it’s not as if he liked Jim like that, no thank you. He’s a pain in the ass, way too reckless and loud, and he is good looking and pretty and smart and… okay so Leonard can appreciate Jim, okay? But they’re best friends, not soulmates.

Leonard sat next to Jim on the couch, who decided that they needed a drink to forget about soulmates. Apparently Jim saw two soulmates meet today, and he knows about Leonard and Jocelyn, so you can’t be certain the first words someone says to you means they’re your soulmate. Leonard didn’t mind drinking, he had a shit week anyways, long hours at the medical center, and long study hours too.

‘We should just promise ourselves to each other. Like, who knows when we meet our soulmates? I say we just stick together until the end, who needs soulmates when we have each other?’  
Leonard looked at Jim, and even though he was slightly inebriated, he thought it was a good plan. Who needs soulmates right? Fuck them, you only know they’re your soulmate after they’re dead. It’s much better to just spend your entire life with your best friend (that you can appreciate for his good looks) knowing he’s your best friend than living with someone who had your first words and might or might not be your soulmate.

And that’s how Leonard and Jim promised each other in their last year at the Academy to stay together forever, soulmates be damned.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jim was running on pure adrenalin. For as far as he could still run of course, with him just being beamed back from Khan’s ship, and having to help Scotty support Carol Marcus. Who apparently was Admiral Marcus’ daughter? That wasn’t important now though, he had to go to sickbay, had to see Bones. Show Bones he’s okay, and make sure Carol gets her leg treated. But also to see Bones, just make sure that he is still alive, for his own sake.

Spock beamed the seventy-two torpedoes over to Khan’s ship. He found Bones inside sickbay after he put Carol down on a biobed. When he heard the torpedoes explode, he looked at Bones.

‘He killed Khan’s crew!’

Bones looked at Jim like he was crazy. ‘Spock’s cold, but he’s not that cold. I’ve got Khan’s crew. Seventy-two human popsicles safe and sound in their cryotubes.’ And he showed the rows, with lots of cryotubes, and Khan’s crew inside them. 

Jim sighed. Of course, Spock would save them. ‘Son of a bitch.’

After this, he had to run to Engineering with Scotty, because the warp core is damaged. The entire trip down there, and all Jim can think about is Bones. If he’s struggling with the gravity, so is Bones. And even when that gets turned back on, thanks to Chekov, they still plummet towards earth. Luckily Scotty sees the problem. The warp core isn’t aligned.

Jim knows what he has to do the moment Scotty tells him what’s wrong. After he knocked out Scotty and put him in a chair, he climbed inside. He knows Bones will kill him for this, but he can’t let the ship just fall down to earth! There are so many people inside who will die. And soulmates who will miss their partner. Just because Jim hasn’t found his, doesn’t mean he doesn’t want the best for everyone else. 

Bones will just have to yell at him later. After he died. Hopefully, not for a long time, Bones deserves the best life ever. A long life, with his soulmate. Not Jocelyn. Hopefully, Bones won’t be too sad he broke their promise. Jim knows he won’t survive this, and he promised Bones to stay together forever, so they wouldn’t have to worry about their soulmates.

But, if Jim was honest to himself, he wouldn’t mind. He knows Bones said his first words to him. He probably never said Bones’ words, but that doesn’t matter. He loves Bones. And now he’s dying before he could ever tell him. At least Bones won’t know, because there’s no way Bones’ words will change into the last words Jim said. He doesn’t even remember what he said last to Bones. Something about Khan’s crew. 

It doesn’t matter, anyway. He’s dying, and he is looking at Spock and trying not to cry. He hopes Bones won’t be too sad. Bones should focus on the people he can save in medbay right now, not on a dying Jim. And if Bones knew what Jim really thought of him, that he loved him, well then Bones would be breaking down this door to save him, contamination be damned. So it’s actually a good thing logical Spock is here to see Jim off to the after-life. Jim doesn’t know if he could have kept it as well together as he does now if it were Bones on the other side. 

But hey, now Bones is free from his promise and can go search for his soulmate.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Leonard stared at his desk. Jim is dead. He died. What now? He never even told Jim about his feelings. He never told the kid he loved him, even if it’s just interpreted in a brotherly way. He saw the body bag once, he can’t look at it again. Damn Jim, dying way before his time. Leonard was supposed to go first! What’s he supposed to do without Jim?!

He sighed and pushed his sleeves up, wanting to look at the words that meant Jim wasn’t his soulmate after all, even if he said the right first words. Leonard didn’t know why he did this, hurt himself like this. Maybe to punish himself for not being able to save Jim this time. He looked at his arm, saw the words and 

WAIT  
WAIT

Leonard looked again. His words had changed. This meant his soulmate had died. He should have known his soulmate, they would have said at least the first words to Leonard, which means they spoke. And now they’re dead?! The only person he remembers that said his first words besides Jocelyn was Jim, and he’s pretty sure Jocelyn isn’t his soulmate.

Jim is dead. Jim is his soulmate?! ‘Think Leonard, what was the last thing he said to you?’  
Leonard is replaying the conversation over and over in his head. Jim was shocked that Spock had killed Khan’s crew. Leonard said Spock didn’t kill them and that he had put them all in cryotubes. And then Jim said: ‘Son of a bitch.’

Leonard looked at his arm again. There it was: ‘Son of a bitch.’ Leonard blinked his eyes and laughed shakily. That kid. Leonard followed him into space, never told him he loved him, and Jim dies saving everyone else. To Leonard, his death meant the end though. Of what, he didn’t know. But how was Leonard supposed to stay on a ship, in space, when the one person who brought him there was dead. The one person who he loved more than anything. And now he didn’t even have a chance to tell him.

He looked to his desk, he had left a tribble there injected with Khan’s blood as an experiment. What he saw on the desk made his eyes widen. The tribble moved! It had been dead, but now it was alive again. Leonard didn’t waste another second. If there was even a slight chance of saving Jim, he would do it. He would break his Hippocratic Oath to bring Jim back from the dead.

Because Leonard wasn’t giving his one shot at true happiness away. Not if that happiness was with Jim.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

‘Ughhh,’ Jim moaned. He had been in this biobed for ages! Bones wouldn’t let him get out, because apparently he got severe radiation from being so close to the warp core. He feels fine now though! Bones healed him, patched him up and everything. He looked grumpy sometimes, but he always does. And in the end the ship was saved, the crew was safe, and even Jim survived. Bones could cut him some slack and just let him leave right?

He wanted to ask last time Bones was here, he wasn’t there as his doctor, because even Bones isn’t allowed to work 24/7 for weeks. He was there as his friend. They talked about how stupid Jim was, and that he almost broke their promise of living together when they got old. Jim even said sorry! He couldn’t ask Bones then to leave early. Bones looked so sad then, because he almost lost Jim. Jim felt guilty about that, but he just had to save everyone. They had a disagreement about it too, and now Bones won’t let him leave until he is sure Jim is fully healed. 

So now Jim is trying to keep Bones happy by being a good patient, because he did get very sick and Spock had to capture Khan. And then Bones had to use Khan's blood to make Jim not sick anymore. But being in a biobed is very very boring. He can’t even have visitors all day! At least Spock was visiting this afternoon, so he could talk to him. Play some chess, tell Spock again why he thought he had to save everyone. Spock wasn’t happy with him either. He explained to Spock that the crew and the ship needed to be saved, but Spock still wasn’t happy. Maybe he should tell him about his crush on Bones, and explain that he just couldn’t live in a world without Bones. That he needed Bones to live. And that that was the main reason he went in, because if Bones wasn’t alive, who would he live for?

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Leonard stared at his soulmate words again. He still couldn’t believe it. Jim was his soulmate! He hasn’t told Jim. He’s not sure if he should tell Jim. Because they made a promise, and that was to live together till old age as best friends. Because they both don’t like the concept of soulmates. Because Leonard wants Jim to love him because he loves Leonard, not because he’s his soulmate and fate tells him he should love Leonard.

Also, how was he supposed to tell Jim? They decided to not tell Jim that he died, they just told him he had severe radiation from the warp core. So how would he suddenly know for sure that Jim is his soulmate, and not years ago when they met? He would have to explain Jim he died for real, and that was one thing he and Spock didn’t want to tell Jim. Jim wouldn’t like the fact that Leonard broke his oath to save Jim. That they both went against everything to save him. Leonard didn’t mind, he would do everything the same if he was sent back in time. No regrets. 

But now what? He had proof that Jim was his soulmate, and new hope that Jim could love him back. How was he supposed to go from there? He never told Jim before to not compromise their friendship, but with this knowledge he still could. It was too confusing, Leonard had to tell someone else. Ask for help maybe, about what to do. Because he couldn’t look at Jim the rest of his life, knowing he’s his soulmate, and then not be his romantic partner. He would be too jealous if Jim got someone, or just had a casual fling. He already had some trouble before when it was just a crush, but with the knowledge he has now it would be too difficult. He had to ask someone for help. But not Spock. He would rat him out to Jim before Leonard was even ready to tell Jim.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

‘Jim, no.’ Spock looked down at Jim and frowned his eyebrows in disagreement. ‘I am not going to tell Doctor McCoy that you are perfectly fine to work again, because you are not. He is the doctor and he knows best, you just have to listen to him.’

Jim sighed. His plan to get Spock to ask Bones if he could be released failed. At least he tried. They already talked about his saving complex (again) and about how he was being kind of stupid (again) but that Spock was still very satisfied with the end result because Jim saved the crew and the ship. And Spock and Bones saved him. And Uhura. She wouldn’t let him forget it either. 

‘You told me you wanted to tell me something else Jim?’ 

Jim grinned at Spock. It took almost dying for his first officer to call him by his first name when they were off duty. ‘Yeah uhm, I have this tiny problem.’ He saw Spock open his mouth to tell him that he could better call for Bones since Spock wasn’t a doctor, so he reassured him. ‘It’s not a medical thing. More about what i thought of in the chamber before I blacked out.’

Spock looked at Jim. ‘I will listen, you can continue your tale.’

Jim smiled. ‘Thanks. Because you know, I first thought about saving the ship you know? Like the crew and the ship itself, and the families who would miss the crew if I didn’t succeed. But then I thought about who would miss me. And I realised my mom and Sam might miss me for a while, but they wouldn’t miss me for long. And the crew would miss me, but they would eventually move on. Except Bones. I realised I couldn’t picture him ever forgetting me, or not missing me. Then I realised that I didn’t want him to miss me. And maybe he might miss me, but I realised that I would miss him if I ever lost him. So I just kept going, because if i didn’t succeed, then Bones would die, and I can’t handle that.’

Spock raised an eyebrow. Jim thought it meant that Spock was not impressed. He couldn’t be sure, because Spock has many eyebrow movements, like, an entire language. So until someone catalogs all the eyebrow raises, he would have to go with instinct. And the instinct with this one was that Spock was not even a little bit impressed or surprised with him.

‘Captain. Jim. You realized during your trip to the warp core that you are in love with Doctor McCoy, have been for a while, and that you would not want to die without him knowing about it?’

‘I didn’t say all that! I just…. okay…. maybe I do think all that. But, how did you know? I didn’t even say all that! Am I that obvious?’

Spock raised his other eyebrow too. ‘To everyone except for the doctor himself, you are very obvious in your romantic feelings towards him. May I inquire why you have not told him yet? You have known him since your first day at the Academy.’

Jim stared at his hands. ‘Well…. it’s just… there’s this soulmate business we humans have… and I know Bones thought he had found his soulmate with his ex-wife, but turned out she wasn’t his soulmate. And and and… I want Bones to have his soulmate, he deserves the best person. And we promised each other to stick together until the end if neither of us found our soulmates. I just… I don’t want to find mine, I just want Bones.’

Jim looked up at Spock with sad eyes. ‘Did you know Bones said my words? The first thing he said to me were my words, but he never reacted when I replied. He never said anything about me being his soulmate. And I don’t want to lose Bones, I’d rather have him as a friend than not at all...’

Spock looked at his captain, lying in bed after he got saved by his best friend. Spock thought that McCoy had gone way beyond the things friends would do for each other. McCoy had never given up, put Jim in a coma until he could save him. ‘Jim, you love doctor McCoy. That is what you say. But by not telling him, you are not giving him a chance to think about it. What if he returns your feelings. By not telling him, you are not giving him a fair chance. He might want to start a relationship with you and not wait for his soulmate. Maybe he is your soulmate but he didn’t realize it. There are too many factors in play, and you should think of yourself and be happy. So just tell doctor McCoy how you feel.’

Jim smiled slightly. ‘Spock, did you just say to go for it and fuck soulmates?’ Spock looked uncomfortable at Jim’s insinuation that he should ignore the universe’s way of giving each other mates for life. Jim his eyes lit up. ‘You totally did! Okay okay. You are right though. I should just tell Bones I love him, soulmates be damned. I have a shot at this, and even if he doesn’t love me back, he won’t make it weird. We can still be friends. Yeah.’ Jim nodded to himself. ‘Thank you, Spock! I am going to confess to Bones next time he visits!’

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

‘Leonard, to what do we owe the pleasure of your presence?’ nurse Chapel looked up from her PADD and stared at Leonard. ‘Boss, you look like shit. Did you even sleep enough? Eat? Go sit down, I’ll give you a hypo for it.’ She pushed Leonard on the small bed M’Benga had in his office. She was there to go over some patients with M’Benga, but now Leonard was here and she was concerned for him. The fact that he did not push her away, or complained, made her think it was really serious.

‘Leonard, what is wrong? Don’t say nothing, Christine and I can both see something is up.’ Geoffrey was done with his day. The captain had started to harass almost everyone he saw about letting him leave the hospital. They couldn’t because Leonard had threatened everyone in the building to give them all kinds of diseases if they listened to Jim. He was debating what was worse: Jim harassing everyone to let him out, or the rage of his co-worker when he did let the captain out. 

Leonard sighed and looked sadly at the two people before him. He trusted them, his head nurse and his co-worker doctor. They were his friends too, and co-workers. They were very good co-workers too. He could ask them about soulmates, they would understand, right? 

‘Okay so please bear with me, but I wanted to ask something of you both.’

Christine and Geoffrey glanced at each other. Their boss never wanted to talk or ask something. Whatever it was about, it must be bad, since Leonard had not grumbled or growled at all since he got there.

‘You know soulmates right? About how the first words they say to you are on your arm, and then when they die the first words they said change into their last words. And like, you might know you’re each other's soulmate because of the first words, but you won’t ever know for sure until one of you dies, right? So most people take the leap and sometimes it goes wrong, but that’s life. Anyways, how would you know the other person is your soulmate, for real? What if you have general words on your arm everyone says. How would you ever know for sure the other person is your soulmate?’

Christine looked back at Geoffrey to see if he had heard the same. Did their boss just come here, on his day off, to ask about soulmates? She wasn’t fully sure what it was about, but if it got her boss and her captain together she would help. Anyone could see they loved each other.

‘Well, if the words match that’s already a first step right? And your soulmate is the person the universe decided would match you. So I think it will be someone you will like a whole lot anyways, and love a lot, and can’t live without them. That’s my take on them. And even if when one of you dies you realize they weren’t your soulmate, you spend your entire life with someone you loved. What more could you want?’

Geoffrey nodded and decided to add his own two cents. ‘And before you ask, no it is not possible to check neurologically. There aren’t any chemicals in your brain or body that act differently when you meet your soulmate, and you know this Leonard. So if you really love someone, just go for it. What is all this talk about anyway?’

Leonard looked up, a desperate but hopeful look in his eyes. ‘You think I should go for it? I have more proof than any other living person, but what if he doesn’t want me?’ 

‘Leonard, everyone can see the captain loves you. Only you and the captain don’t see you love each other. So yes, go for it. ’ Christine tried to calm Leonard down. He really was an idiot sometimes. 

‘Wait, did you say more proof? Leonard….. Jim really died, didn’t he? So your words changed? That’s definitely proof of the universe you belong together. ’ Geoffrey opened the door of his office, hoping Leonard would finally go to the captain and confess his love. That way nobody would have to suffer through all their unresolved sexual tension ever again. 

Leonard stood up, determined. Yes, he would show Jim he loved him. Even if Jim didn’t love him back. And if Jim didn’t want them to be together even as soulmates, well, at least he tried. He couldn’t go through his life knowing who his soulmate was and not telling them. That wasn’t fair to Jim. Or anyone else for the matter, because most people didn’t know until their partner died. 

‘But, what about the lie? We have to tell him that he died for real. He’ll know I broke my oath! That I had a trial and stuff...’

Geoffrey slowly pushed Leonard towards the door. ‘Don’t worry, we’ll figure something out. He will be too happy at first to even notice the words. Tell him it was a short death and you brought him back. Some cases with people who flatlined and had CPR also had changed words, there is no rule about how long someone should be dead. It will be fine. Now go get him.’

After Leonard stumbled out the door, the doctor looked at Christine. ‘This better solve all the tension they have. Also, I hope Leonard will take Jim out the biobed now because I can’t handle his requests anymore.’

Christine nodded and agreed. The captain was not a model patient, and you needed lots of patience to handle all his questions.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jim looked up when the door opened. Last time it was a nurse coming to check in on him, but he was fine. He smiled big when he saw who entered the room. ‘Bones! I have been waiting for you forever.’

Leonard sits on the chair Spock was occupying earlier this afternoon and huffs. ‘Well, I was busy. I am here now though. Why are you in such a good mood? Heard good news I haven’t heard yet?’ Leonard tried not to show how nervous he was. He was going to confess to Jim now, and even though he knew they were soulmates it was terrifying.

Jim nodded happily. ‘Yeah, something like that. You could say that. I had a talk with Spock and I realized some things and I want to tell them now so please just listen and don’t go screaming at me yet?’

‘Did you leave the room, like I ordered you not to do?’ Leonard immediately got concerned Jim had put a strain on his body. The kid was still healing after all!

‘No no, nothing like that. Don’t worry Bones.’ Jim grabs Bones’ hands and holds them in his lap. ‘I just, you know I never liked soulmates? Because my words are dumb and I heard them way too often. And I met you and you didn’t like soulmates either since you never know for sure if someone is your soulmate until they die. And I just, I am in love with this person, and I know they said my words, but they never said if I had said their words. I am just scared they don’t like me back. And even if they’re not my soulmates, I don’t care. I love them and I want to spend the rest of my life together with them. I love you Bones.’ He looked up at Bones, seeing some tears in his eyes. 

‘Why… why… why are you crying? I love you dammit! You’re not supposed to cry!’

Leonard laughed softly and smiled. ‘Jim, darlin’. I love you too. I love you so much. But don’t say fuck soulmates, because we are. We are soulmates Jim, and I love you so much.’

Jim looked confused. ‘But, you never said anything about me saying your words?’

‘That’s because you never said anything about me saying yours. And after Jocelyn, I didn’t want a soulmate. But I fell in love with you and realized I wanted you. I just never said anything because I wanted you to meet your own soulmate. I didn’t want to be the one holding you back. But that’s not possible anymore. Because you are my soulmate.’

Jim rubbed his eyes. He wasn’t crying, he had some excess liquid in his body that thought this was the right moment to come out of him. ‘Show me. Show me the words. I want you to be the one Bones, I really do. Please show me?’ He lifted up his own arm, showing the words Leonard first said to Jim: I might throw up on you. 

Leonard nodded. Pulled his arm back from Jim’s lap. ‘Jim, darlin’, you have to know my words changed. You… when you went into the warp core, you didn’t end up in a coma. You flatlined. Your heart stopped. It is working now and all again, but it had stopped. So the reason I am fully sure we are soulmates is because my words changed.’

He showed his arm to Jim, and Jim looked in awe. There, on Bones’ arm, weren’t the words he first said to him in the shuttle. No, it held the words he said to Leonard just before he ran to the warp core. The last words Bones would have heard ever from him, had he really died. ‘Son of a bitch.’

‘You are mine. You’re my soulmate. And you love me.’ Tracing the words on Bones’ arm made it real to Jim. He belonged to his Bones. His Bones. They would be together now, until the end. And he couldn’t ask more than that. Okay, maybe a kiss. Bones was ahead of him though. He tilted Jim’s head upwards and smiled softly. ‘I love you, Jim. Forever.’ And then he kissed him.


End file.
